Sunday, February 3, 2008

Sometimes even my favorites don't get any love


According to Google reader, I have subscribed to 73 different blogs. And that number changes daily, whether I find a new one to add – or take one off I added just to see if I wanted to keep reading it. Trying to keep up with that many blogs is like a full time job, oh to get paid for reading!! But something has to suffer.


I am the first one to tell you that housework is not my first priority so that gets done last. Then of course there is my jewelry making which has been sadly neglected lately in favor of living vicariously through all these wonderful people out there who let me peek into their lives on a daily basis! Or not so wonderful people, sometimes those blogs are interesting too.


My kids are old enough now that my reading blogs doesn’t take anything away from them, but really, like I told someone the other day – if I had had access to all this connectivity when my children were little they would have been raising themselves. No Mommy awards at my house if that were the case. I’m just glad I didn’t have that temptation at the time and I admire any of those Moms out there who blog and parent with balance.


Since I never ever never ever (really really) read blogs at work, ahem, my day job never suffers one iota. Ever. Really.


A huge casualty has been how much I comment on all the blogs I read. As the number of blogs I have subscribed to has increased, the number of comments I make has decreased. I used to try to comment every time someone commented on my blog. Or at least hop over to their blog and leave a comment there. But I find in reading so many, I tend to be governed more by my mood, or to be honest - the amount of posts I have to read vs. the amount of time I have.


A rant? Oh, I don’t feel like a rant today, I’ll mark that as read and move on. Funny? Okay, funny is good but I’m not really relating to this. Move on. Emotional? Oh, I feel bad but I really don’t know what to say, off I go. A post that makes me laugh that I can relate directly to my own experience? But, oh look, they already have 45 comments, there is simply nothing left to say that someone else hasn’t already! A post so incredibly clever and witty that every comment left is better than the next? I wither under the intimidation factor, lets face it I’m just not that funny. Off to the next. And on it goes.


But I feel bad about it. I enjoy all the blogs I read, but I will admit the sheer volume makes commenting on all - or even most of them impossible. Does it make anyone else feel bad to read and hop from blog to blog without commenting a lot of the time? How do other people manage it? Do they cut down on the amount they are loyal to? Do they only comment when they really believe they are contributing or do they comment because they feel they should?



What do you do?




26 Comments:

Mahala said...

I used to comment religiously on all the blogs I read. Once, I commented on a really popular blog (one of the "cool kids") and what I said was taken wrong.. or I said it wrong.. I'm not sure.. and I rec'd a very public, very brutal butt reaming. It's taken me a while to get back in the swing of things lol.

Gemheaven said...

HI BetteJo
I tend to read them all but only comment on the ones I feel I have something to say. I am naughty and tend to also leave comments on people I have built up a rapport with - those who don't ever comment on mine well I don't tend to leave ones on theirs either. BUt mainly its if I feel I have something to say then and only then I leave one.
OOOh I do go on don't I!!!!

BetteJo said...

Holy crap Mahala - not sure if I'd have the nerve to comment again after that!

..and Jo - it's hard not to comment on your blog when all your jewelry pieces are so beautiful! On the other hand - when I'm in a hurry or tired - I like to just admire the pictures. :)

Jenk said...

I've cut down to 28 blogs. It was so hard. Oh-so-hard.

I also only comment when I really feel like saying something. I don't have the time to leave "Me, too" comments anymore.

If I have something to say, I say it. Otherwise, I move along to the next one.

BetteJo said...

28 blogs? Wow! I guess I do tend to be a bit excessive.

MsCatCalls said...

HI Bette Jo

I dont really comment that much on other people s blogs , mainly because I see that other people do and there seems no need , unless I have something really different to say . But I LOVE the fact that you always comment on mine , and I actually worry when you havent visited , and I say to my sister I wonder if Bette Jo is ok , its mainly because you are always there an d not many other people do comment though I know from my stats that other people do regularly visit but I dont know who they are or much about them and I feel I do know you , so I like your visits ! Does this make sense .... ?

LadyBanana said...

Brilliant post!

I feel so much the same as you, it's very difficult to fit it all in and still have time do anything else.

I resent the fact that work takes me away from blogging!

I'm still unsure how to handle it all, particularly when I still want to read it all and comment on all!

BetteJo said...

S - yes it makes sense, you do feel like you know people after a while! It's so nice to know I'm missed, it's usually because I simply don't have time. I hate that. :(

Lady B - Thank you! It's hard to manage when you really want to give equal attention to everyone. On the other hand - what do those bloggers do who get upwards of 30 plus comments per post! Must be hard to be so popular. Sigh-h-h.

Dixie said...

I do the same thing.

Stimey said...

It's funny, I was trying to comment on this and then I had to get off my computer to go parent. But I'm back! I know that everyone loves comments, so I try to comment a lot, but usually just if I have something to add to the conversation. But I admit that sometimes I just don't have enough time to comment.

Honeysuckle Rose said...

I leave a comment if I feel like I have something to add or want to show support.

I agree with Mscatcalls though ... I always look forward to your comments on my blog and I worry if I don't see you for a day or so LOL

*Hugs*

BetteJo said...

I should have asked this question months ago! So much love .. :)

Robin Marie said...

I'm subscribed to 28 also! Some I don't read most of the time but have subscribed to because they occasionally appeal to me. Some are just photos, and I don't usually have a lot to say. I comment when I feel the urge, and move on when I don't!

Lost A Sock said...

Boy this IS a tough one. I find myself reading most through my feed reader (80-ish?) though I do often fall behind for the exact reason you mentioned. Heh, my kids.

I really do comment in only a handful of places, usually for lack of time. On the days I actually post to my blog, I get very little reading done because my computer time is so limited.

Then, of course, guilt. Guilt that I would like to comment everywhere and cannot, guilt that I'm reading blogs while my children entertain themselves for a bit.

I do love the blogosphere, though. :O)

Lara said...

oh my gosh, there have been so many posts about this recently! i'm terrible about commenting, mostly because i lack the energy to be clever, and i shudder to think i might leave a comment that wouldn't be the epitome of wit! really, though, i try to remember the blogging is a form of conversation, and i should make an effort to contribute to it sometimes, and not eavesdrop quite so often. ;)

but still? it's hard, and i often fail to follow through. sigh...

The Beading Gem said...

I for one am grateful you comment on my blog! I too only comment when I have something meaningful to say. But I couldn't keep up with as many blogs as you do (under 20 for me) unless we get 48 hrs in a day.

Jessica said...

I feel as though my blogging and commenting is very cyclical. Sometimes I have plenty to post about and say. Sometimes I don't...

I know I always appreciate the little notes I get from you on my blog...and I always MEAN to go back and comment on others. Time just seems to get sucked away from me...

Anyways...thank you for commenting!

jessica

Day Dreamer said...

I comment on yours because I want to. I'm like you, tho, I often read and do not comment....what time!??
I'd love to comment on them all...but...

We can't rightly just post to say we've read it and moved on!!! Can we?

Drew said...

I completely agree with Jessica and Day Dreamer. Sometimes you have more to say than other times and it really does feel cyclical. (And I do appreciate your comments on mine!)

But you should only comment when you feel you have something to say. If you start feeling you HAVE to comment, you need to start introducing yourself to support groups. ;-)

BetteJo said...

The toughest part for me is having so many I want to read and just not having enough time!

Robin Marie - I see why you get more done than I do, you're not as attached to your computer. Good for you!

Molly - I think you win with 80-ish! But honestly, you are someone who accomplishes a lot so somehow I can see you keeping up with all those!

Lara you are such a talented writer I can't imagine you leaving a lame comment anywhere!

Beading G - Yes, more hours in the day - that would be so useful! But knowing me - I would just add more blogs to my reader!

Jessica I agree with you about the cyclical part, I go through times where I am really up to date and other times when it's just too hard and I'll let it go for days.

DD- No, not enough time, ever! But when people you read go away for a while and *ahem* don't post at all - you miss them and yes, worry too!

Dixie - you are very good at answering the comments on your blog! And always funny too!

Stimey - not enough time is the universal complaint, but people with young kids like you - I'm amazed you manage what you do!

H Rose - Yeah, you disappeared for a little while and I worried. Seems like you get to know people and their pattern of posting - and you hope they're just taking some time off and nothing is wrong!



Thanks everybody - I love the response! I'm only sorry I can't comment everywhere all the time - but then I wouldn't have time to read!

BetteJo said...

Drew - when you're not around I always assume it's because of school. But still I wonder..
Support groups? I did wonder out loud a time or 2 about a 12-step program for blog addiction!

Karoli said...

Hi there, I found your blog via the Blogher links on the ads and loved your post.

I read over 350 blogs per day. Some are for business (in fact, lots are) and many are favorites or friends. I don't comment as often as I should, choosing instead to share friends' posts via Google Reader shared items or if they inspire me to a post, I'll link back to them.

My biggest failing is not replying to comments posted on my blog. I even wrote a blog post about how hard it is to always reply. I have nothing but admiration for the folks who do.

Nice to meet ya,

Karoli

Day Dreamer said...

BetteJo....You know what? Your commenting means a bunch to me. Even when I *at hum* dissappear for a while, you're there reminding me why I started this in the first plae. It's comments like yours that have made my day go a little brighter at times. I think I'm going to have to do less passing through and more acknowledging....

BetteJo said...

Karoli - yes I believe I've dropped by your blog too a time or 2. But 350 blogs? A day?? I think I'd have a seizure! :)

DD - thank you very much! You are SO sweet!

Maddy said...

I definitely feel obliged to comment if I've read, but if there are loads of comments which already say what I might have said, then I probably wouldn't.

Google reader is both a blessing and a curse.

There again when I changed over to google reader, there were still a few blogs that I wasn't able to put on my google reader [mentioning no names of course!]

So what do we do with such people? I go back to the old system of bookmarks in my side bar - the title of the bookmark is 'no feed blogs' which sounds as if I'm trying to starve them!
Cheers

LADY ROOTS said...

Sistren BetteJo,

Peaceful greetings from Jamaica.

Each of us strives to find a balance between the "I wanna..." and the "I gotta..."'s in life.

If a blogger's post has SOUL-touched me, I want them to know it. Many blogs may temporarily amuse me, but that doesn't warrant a comment.

Because my blog, Voice From Jamaica, is an invitation to stop by and visit, if anyone take their precious time to leave a comment, I feel it is only good manners (Jamaicans call it home training) for me to reply.

I like the humour in your posts and I like your jewelry, too!

Bless Up,
Lady Roots