Dream a little dream ..

So Sunday I woke up with a headache and the remnants of a dream chasing around in my head. I went to see Amanda, she was picking me up at the airport with her husband because you know, we're tight.


I was lost for a while on wet dark streets and then at a park where the sun was shining and there was ice cream, and then back to Amanda's house where I was smoking cigarettes inside without asking, and I don't even smoke!


Jennifer Aniston came walking up and looked at me like she thought she knew me, so I assured her we had only run into each other once or twice at parties, but we didn't know each other. As if!


She must have been Amanda's friend.


At some point I was sad because Amanda's beautiful girls were nowhere to be found, and Sean (Amanda's husband) gave me a HUGE photo album to look through while Amanda pointed out some little carved words she mounted by the door bell. I have no idea what they said but I got the idea they were a little naughty. I was thinking I shouldn't drink so much, maybe that's why I have a headache, incorporating my real headache into the dream.


I know there were all kinds of details of some pretty dresses and the small brick ranch with a full view storm door that looks nothing like Amanda's house. Dinner, snacking, talking, drinking. All in bits and pieces here and there. Weird.


When it was time to leave I drove myself and I had to stop at a doctor's appointment but they got my appointment wrong and tried to teach me how to train a dog as opposed to whatever screening exam I thought I was having.


I don't usually remember my dreams but this one was in the morning just before I got up and I was thinking about it as I woke up. What was Jennifer Aniston doing there? Was she supposed to see me and then absolutely dismiss me? Oh well. I don't think my feelings were hurt. In any event, I forgive her, and I thank Amanda and Sean for their hospitality. It was a very nice visit.


I think. Dreams being what they are, you can never be sure.

Maxine Monday

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The versatility of Vodka

1. To remove a bandage painlessly, saturate the bandage with vodka. The solvent dissolves adhesive
2. To clean the caulking around bathtubs and showers, fill a trigger-spray bottle with vodka, spray the caulking, let set five minutes and wash clean. The alcohol in the vodka kills mold and mildew.
3. Clean jewelry. Soak the jewelry in vodka for five minutes, then rinse, and dry.
4. Clean lipstick from clothing. Rub the stain with vodka, then throw into your regular wash.
5. Remove the glue left behind by a bumper sticker. Rub the glue with a soft, clean cloth soaked with vodka
6. Prolong the life of razors by filling a cup with vodka and letting your safety razor blade soak in the alcohol after shaving. The vodka disinfects the blade and prevents rusting.
7. Spray vodka on vomit stains, scrub with a brush, then blot dry.
8. Using a cotton ball, apply vodka to your face as an astringent to cleanse the skin and tighten pores.
9. Add a jigger of vodka to a 12-ounce bottle of shampoo. The alcohol cleanses the scalp, removes toxins from hair, and stimulates the growth of healthy hair.
10. Fill a sixteen-ounce trigger-spray bottle and spray bees or wasps to kill them.
11. Pour one-half cup vodka and one-half cup water in a Ziplock freezer bag and freeze for a slushy, refreshable ice pack for aches, pain or black eyes.
12. Fill a clean, used mayonnaise jar with freshly packed lavender flowers, fill the jar with vodka, seal the lid tightly and set in the sun for three days. Strain liquid through a coffee filter, then apply the tincture to aches and pains.
13. To relieve a fever, use a washcloth to rub vodka on your chest and back as a liniment.
14. To cure foot odor, wash your feet with vodka.
15. vodka will disinfect and alleviate a jellyfish sting.
16. Pour vodka over an area affected with poison ivy to remove the urushiol oil from your skin.
17. Swish a shot of vodka over an aching tooth. Allow your gums to absorb some of the alcohol to numb the pain.
18. Soothe a sore throat. Add a tablespoon of vodka to glass of warm water and gargle. The alcohol helps numb the sore throat.
19. Eliminate swimer's ear. If you don't have rubbing alcohol, fill an eardropper with vodka, and squeeze it into the affected ear, then let it drain out.

But MY advice? Just drink the vodka and you won’t give a damn about the rest of those things!

And now for something completely different ~

Hidden Mahala's most recent post gives us a bit of information that quite a few people can use about now. Here's what she had to say:


"Back a few years ago, when the HR manager actually like.. worked and stuff.. she told us about this church sponsored program called "Angel Food Ministries." With locations all over the country, you can preorder boxes of their very low priced groceries ($30, for around $65 worth of food,) then pick it up on the designated delivery day. There is no "eligibility"requirement, nothing to fill out. Income has nothing to do with the program at all. Roll up in your Beemer or ride your bicycle.. everyone is welcome. For more information, click the link and check the menu for participating locations in your area. You can buy as many $30 boxes as you want and they also have "bonus" boxes of veggies, cookout stuff and meat for anywhere from $16-$20. (This is not a sponsored post.. I just thought ya'll might be interested.)"


Thanks for sharing, Mahala.

I might be up late

I've written about spiders before, and how much I dislike them. I don't like to, but I am perfectly willing to squish any spider that I find in my house. And for a while I was also willing to let the spider living behind the kitchen sink stay - so I could throw any ants I found into it's web. It was serving a purpose. I may hate ants in my kitchen more than I hate spiders. Or maybe not.


But the big spiders, the ones that are furry and run faster than fast - are always a problem. If I'm not fast enough they are gone and I sit and keep checking my arms, my feet, where ever I feel the slightest itch - because I just KNOW that spider wants nothing more than to climb on ME. Uh huh.


If I AM fast enough, then what? These spiders are too big to squish with a Kleenex, and smacking them with something is gross because they crunch. Not to mention that they leave a big splotch if they are on a wall.


Recently when I spotted a can of something that was supposed to kill spiders and things like scorpions on contact, I knew the stuff was for me. I bought it without hesitation, and put it on the floor next to the couch within easy reach so I would be armed when the moment arose. Except somehow, the can of stuff got put away! Go figure!


Which is why tonight when I caught the flash of something running across the carpet I was caught without anything to use against the varmint. The first thing that occurred to me was - containment! I jumped off the couch and grabbed a small plastic container from the bookcase, because I may put the bug spray away but Lord knows Rubbermaid can dress up a living room like nobodies business!


I thunked the container over the spider and sat for a minute with my finger pushing down on the bottom, now top, of the plastic container. What to do, what to do? Knowing the spider had Herculean strength I plopped a stone coaster on it to hold it down and ran into the kitchen, got the magic spray, and gave it a test spray onto a paper towel held over the sink. Click. Click? A spray can isn't supposed to click when you push down on the button. NOTHING came out. Click click click. Wha-a-a.


Now I have a spider under a small Rubbermaid container with coasters (I added another for weight), sitting in my living room. I actually feel bad for the spider, seeing him go round and round and I picture him in there gasping for air as he dies a slow and agonizing death. Yeah, I should BE so lucky.


Spider is very much alive, although he has stopped moving around a lot, I think he finally figured out he's not going anywhere. And me? I am sitting in a way that I can keep my eye on him, making sure the cats don't tip the container over, and reassuring myself that he has not escaped and crawling up my leg as I write.


Let the cats have him you say? Did I hear that? Um, no. These cats might chase him a bit, even try to take a whack at him. But the spider would get away and I would be dealing with it anyway.


Enjoy the really bad photographs, I'll be right here. Watching the spider. *yawn* I might be up late tonight.


What am I waiting for? I'm waiting for my daughter to get home. She has decided everything has a right to live, and regularly captures and releases spiders back out into the wild that is our front yard. This is right up her alley. Gah-h!


~You can always click on the pictures to see them bigger but the photos are so bad it probably won't help. Yuk.


**Edited to add - Dani came home and, never taking the phone from her ear - she slid a piece of paper beneath the cup and deftly moved the spider to freedom. And glad to do it too. Now I can leave the room and get ready for bed. Nite all!