Voicemail, and English as a second language.

Out-sourcing. Not my favorite topic. But I'm not sure that's even what I'm talking about so it may be a moot point.

There was a voicemail on my phone at work today. I listened to it - or maybe I should say I tried to listen to it. A few sentences into the message I pulled the phone away from my ear and looked at it - like it was going to tell me something about what I was listening to.

It was funny. I couldn't help but laugh. I transferred the call to my co-worker asking if she could possibly translate. She listened to it several times, even replaying the first few sentences over and over because those were the least intelligible. We both laughed because it did not even sound anywhere close to a real language - much less English! She came up with "somebody died - and it had something to do with Polish sausage!" Beyond that - I was out of luck.

I never did figure out what the man was saying. I made out enough words - maybe 4 - but they were an important 4 - that the call was work related and probably in regard to some support I had requested. No idea what support, no idea what the problem was, who the message was from or why he was calling me. I deal with issues all day long. No clue which issue this was about.

He left a number to call him back but I just couldn't bring myself to do it because I knew I wouldn't be able to understand him. I also knew that if I did talk to him and heard anything remotely like Polish sausage and dying - I would have popped a vessel in my eye trying to hold back the laughter on the phone.

Which brings me back to out-sourcing. My company does it. Some. I am sure this was someone calling me from overseas to address an issue I had requested assistance with. Whether or not I agree with the concept of hiring people overseas for less money than an American worker would make in order to bump up the bottom line, I do have strong feelings I'm willing to express about one aspect of it.

Can we make sure the people we hire over in those other countries can at least speak English in a manner that is understandable by the average American?

PLEASE??

I live in the United States. It is where the company is based, it is where our clients are and where our employee's paychecks are coming from. I understand English is their second language and I do not blame them for not being able to speak it well. Hell - it's my FIRST language and I certainly don't!

But the people doing the hiring need to tighten up the qualifications for those jobs so at least we (meaning me) can understand them well enough to have a conversation with them!

All I could do was laugh and shrug my shoulders, knowing that tomorrow I will have to put some effort into which issue needs addressing. Tonight - all I could do was laugh about the deadly Polish sausage and it's ability to kill.

Because that's the closest thing to a translation that I had.

Gross. But funny.

Score! I made it to work today on time despite the fact that I had to climb into the attic and empty the sled before I showered. Oh - and the roasting pan. Yep, found another leak last night
when I was up there emptying the sled before bed.

We had tornadoes in the area last night. Bunches of people had their power knocked out, trees landed on cars and roofs were ripped off. And I was in my attic dipping a sponge into the water sitting in a pink sled and squeezing the water into a bucket.

"Mom! You can't go into the attic when there's a tornado warning!"

"Watch me."

The rain had slowed for the moment, there was a lot of lightning but c'mon - it was time for bed.
So you know of course that once I got down from the attic, emptied the bucket and pushed the
ladder back up into it's space, it started to rain and storm again. Groan...!

I was afraid that when I went to bed I would worry about the water and would have trouble
sleeping. Uh .. nope. Slept like a baby. Got up this morning and did the process over again.

It was supposed to rain today but it hasn't done it yet. I'm sure it will start to hail right before bed or something.

Told my boss about getting up in the attic before I showered this morning and he said "Why take a shower? Just go stand in the closet!

I told him he was funny. Gross. But funny.

Wonderful weekend!

Woo hoo! I wasn’t sick this weekend! The kids were otherwise occupied, I was on my own pretty much and I got a few things done. I ordered pizza and cannoli, had it delivered and settled in to enjoy a quiet and indulgent weekend. Yes, I said cannoli. Delivered to my house.

You know it couldn’t last, right? There had to be a catch for goodness sake. What would a weekend be for me if something unexpected didn’t happen?

This weekend it was mold. Wet cardboard, fuzzy walls, and a heretofore undiscovered hole in the roof. Yay me.

Dani doesn’t use the closet in her bedroom on a daily basis, it’s small and she has boxes stacked in there as well as some dresses and odds ‘n ends. So when she went into the closet on Sunday and found wet and mildew and mold covering everything in there, it was quite a shock.

Of course it was me who climbed into the attic to look for the leak. It was me who took the ladder out to look at the roof in the back of the house. And it was me who pulled those boxes and blankets and everything else out of the closet and into the garage. It was me sitting at my computer searching for something that would kill mold on drywall, me with the towel tied over my nose and mouth wiping down the walls inside the closet while trying not to breathe.

So after all that – it was also me who placed a call to my landlord (lady) who when she returned my call said “e-e-e-w-w-w!” Uh, yeah, I agree.

This house does not have central air. We’ve got a wall unit off the living room, one in the back of the house where my son lives, and a tiny one in the bead room. There isn’t one in my bedroom and not in Dani’s room either. The difference is – I sleep with my door open and she doesn’t. Can you say stuffy?

Guess who it was who went out to the garage when all manner of cooling appliances were being run at one time to try to dry out the closet –

and caused the electricity in the whole front of the house to go out? Uh huh. I love changing those old fuses that

look like shotgun shells – one for the front of the house and one for the back. Burned myself on a hot fuse too,

aint we got fun?

Finally went to bed last night way later than I should have, trying to figure out what to do because the forecast was calling for – you know already, right? Rain and storms for the next two days. I wasn’t expecting it to be dark

and stormy before I even got out of bed though. Luckily it had not started raining yet so I fed the cats and then did the only thing I could think of. I went out to the garage in my jammies, got a pink plastic sled and carried it into the house and up the attic stairs. Er .. ladder. I slid the sled across to the back eaves where the hole was – and left it there to catch the rain. MacGyver even before breakfast.

I’m guessing we got hit by lightning a few weeks ago. I remember a crack of thunder so loud it woke me up and

sent me to the windows to see if something, a tree, a house – the power lines – had been struck by lightning and were lighting up the night sky with flames. I didn’t see anything and went back to bed. Ha! Didn’t think it might be my own house. But the hole in the roof looks to be

about the size of a half dollar, the shingles all tossed in a circular pattern around it.

We will get the roof fixed, replace the drywall,

and someday maybe I will get the smell of mildew out of my nose. And hopefully soon I will have a puke-less, pain and mold free weekend I can enjoy. Also hopefully – I will be able to do it without waiting for the other shoe to drop!

** There are pictures but blogger isn't letting me post them right now. Gr-r-r.

***Yay! Got my pictures posted - woo hoo!

Maxine Monday

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Just amazing.

I follow all the blogs I do using Google reader. I don't usually read them right there, but if it says there are 42 posts to read, I don't go looking for 43 and 44. So it was with great surprise that I scrolled down to the bottom of my list of blogs last night, and discovered I had somehow managed to put a bunch of them into a folder! ??? I have no idea how.

But that is why Stimey had to email me to tell me I had won a Stimey luggage tag in her give-away - YAY ME!! - and why it is only tonight that I am commenting on some posts from Wednesday. How do I do things like that and not know it?

And the choice of blogs that were in the folder didn't even make sense. They didn't all fit into one category or anything. I had to drag them out of the folder and back up into the regular list which apparently doesn't alphabetize on it's own and now they are all out of order. I amaze me sometimes.

For the most part though, it's been a good week. Several people out on vacation at work so things were super busy which is always better than super slow. Plus I had a few issues I was able to resolve which not only made me feel good - it made me look good too. Always a good combination on the job.

Tired though, but it's a good kind of tired. Feel like I've accomplished things, and I rewarded myself with a mini-nap after work today. I managed about a half hour nap after finding a comfortable position on the couch, letting the cats sort things out while they jockeyed for position and finding something on TV I could sleep to. Nice. Just long enough to feel refreshed but not so long that I can't sleep tonight.

If you've gotten this far I'm sure you've realized absolutely nothing is going on here. At least with me. My daughter's boyfriend will be coming for the weekend but they can't stay here because he is allergic to cats. I am not offended by this - he can't help it. It's fine. Allergic I can handle - I would much rather he was allergic than be someone who feels the need to stomp their feet or throw their hats at my animals. That's weak. But when your body tells you you can't be near something - you have to pay attention. So I won't be seeing much of Dani this weekend.

Andy either actually, he's at Lollapalooza tonight, tomorrow, and Sunday. He'll be home to sleep and shower and that's about it. He'll be home after I go to bed tonight and up before I wake up in the morning. I probably won't even see his wristband run by. That boy does love an event.

So here's to hoping I won't totally sit on my butt this weekend and do nothing, because God knows - there are always things to get done around here!